Thursday, February 25, 2010

The "First Adolescence"

It
has
been
brought
to my attention
that my son, Caleb,
has been replaced with a




Hyde-ian
doppelganger.




This is evident
due to the
following behaviors:

  • speaking in the negative
  • selective deafness
  • boredom
  • irritability
  • destructive to own and others’ possessions
  • lashing out
  • fair-weather affection
  • excessive whining
  • has become picky regarding his diet: loss of appetite in carrots, chicken nuggets, Mexican food, rice, zucchini pie, stroganoff, scrambled eggs, squash, celery, mashed potatoes, broccoli, salad…
has a taste for only pizza, French fries, string cheese, oatmeal, most fruits, vats of ketchup, spaghetti, PB sandwich, garlic bread, cereal, waffles and soup.
Yep, that covers it.





These behaviors are most common in teenagers not in 23 month olds;
therefore, something is
amiss.
The obvious conclusion
(Obviously)
is that my son has been swapped for a rather short adolescent who is holding me and my patience
hostage.












I urge any Caleb-sightings to be reported to this blog,
in hopes that I will soon be reunited with my sweet, sweet son.
Until then . . .









send reinforcements.




March 26th, you scoundrel!
I've been robbed! :(

Sunday, February 21, 2010

The Status is not quo.



Those of you
who have befriended me on Facebook know the status shenanigans I pull.
Or at least try to pull.

Like a couple weeks ago when my status read something along the lines of: Angela is going to write the Great American Novel. The first line will read: In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I've been turning over in my mind ever since. And it will end: So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

Wait for it.
Wait_______for_________it.
No one got the reference. Well, that is not entirely true. Two English majors “liked” the status, so it is safe to assume they found it amusing.
I apologize to anyone I have misled, it was joke. I have no yearning to write the Great American Novel, I can barely update this blog once a week! The lines I quoted in the status were from F. Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby. :)

I’m such a literature snob.





AnYwHoo,
here’s some of my status updates from this past week. They are pretty mild. Read on. Don’t be ashamed if you have to google. You know me and my random references. ; )

(And apparently, according to the FB feed, I need cupcakes....?
Didn't they get the memo about my diet?)


click image to enlarge



PS A lot of guys ignore the laugh, and that's about standards.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Don't lose your marbles.

Click here to learn how to make your own marble!


I read banned books. Right now I am re-reading one of my favorite banned books. A book that year after year continues to top the most challenged book list due to sexual content, offensive language, religious viewpoint, being unsuited to age group and violence.

And every year I re-read it.

There are no excuses, only justifications. :)

This time around I really appreciated the craft of the writer. After another year of junky novels, I was once again feasting on composition cuisine.

Without giving too much of the plot away, here’s a brief overview pertaining to my point (yes some of my posts do have points):

Amid a New England catholic high school for boys there is a student society that assigns their peers to perform pranks. In the hierarchy of the society there is the Assigner who contrives the tasks and appoints it to a student. Just like any reasonable society there is a mechanism to keep leaders in check. In order to keep the Assigner’s ideas moderated a box with six marbles (five white and one black) is used. After each assignment is given the Assigner draws a marble from the box, unknowing which marble he will select. If the black marble is extracted than the Assigner will have to perform the conceived prank.

Remember how reading in bed doesn’t leave crumbs in your linens, only morsels in your lucidity?

Here’s something I’ve been gnawing on: Wouldn’t it be great if all of us had a black marble to keep us conservative? With our opinions, favors, delegation, advise?

Sometimes I forget how easy I have it. I mean, I am a Mormon woman of higher education, my husband has a occupation that allows me to stay home with my child, his career also pays for him to seek a graduate degree at an ivy league institution. Yeah. Wouldn’t trade places with anyone.
But that doesn’t stop me from advising other people in different circumstances (not worse nor lesser, just different) then my own. Brings new meaning to the idiom:
Don’t lose your marbles.

I also considered the tasks we endure perform in this life. I came to the conclusion that there doesn’t need to be a black marble in play with the Plan. It’s already been done. Our Assigner has already been there, done that and is able to assist us due to His experience.

This morning I read an article by President Monson that rocked. Yes, rocked.
There I say, even rolled?

In the article he relates the journey of the glass that adorns the St. George Tabernacle* windows. It traveled from the eastern states to California on boat. But that was not the tricky part. The difficulty was paying for the glass from fragile pockets. Needless to say, through various sacrifices members were able to raise the money through exercising faith and trust in the Lord.
Now, for the humdinger, the quote that followed the tale:

“Tabernacles and temples are built with more than
stone and mortar, wood and glass.
Particularly is this true when we speak of the temple described by the Apostle Paul:
‘Know ye not that ye are the temple of God,and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?’
Such temples are built with faith and fasting.They are built with service and sacrifice.
They are built with trials and testimonies.”


Diverse is the tasks we are asked to perform on this earth.
We have joys. We have trials.
These are the stones and mortar.

People are undergoing major construction.
Let’s be kind.




Yes, then we have the token Caleb collage because
we know my mom doesn't read for my recorded epiphanies.


*I've been there, have you? Can't wait to see it again! How many more months 'til JULY?!
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